I want to go back to the time when the only thing that hurt was skinned knees.

I bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about and she's got everything that i have to live without; she'd better hold him tight, give him all her love, look in those beautiful eyes and know she's lucky. .


I wish i could be numb right now, cause all these feelings are fucking me up pretty bad.

[Improbable Letter] Hate Is A Strong Word But I Really Really Really Don't Like You.

Dear You,

I hate you. Ever since you came into my life, it's been a mess. You're a self absorbed jackass, who thinks just because he has money he can do anything and hurt anyone. Well reality check loser, it doesn't work that way.

I feel sorry for people who have to put up with you because frankly, you're a no good asshole. You drink, you smoke and then you say you've become a better person.

I'm not the least bit interested in you. I think you need to get a fucking life. Stop texting me. Stop calling me. I'm not gonna reply.

I don't need or want you in my life. I have other important stuff in my life rather than running after someone as pathetic as you.

Yes. You are and always were pathetic. You're rich and therefore you can buy anything. An admission to a great university despite your pathetic grades. Well, there are people who actually need to study to secure aids and scholarships to schools and universities because their parents don't have all the money in the world. Right now you may think you own the world but you don't. You're just another nobody and with that pathetic attitude of yours you'll always be a fucking failure.

I don't want to waste time after people like you, who make my life difficult.
Seriously, get over yourself. You're not as amazing as you think you are. Actually you're not amazing at all. You're just an asshole whom i NEVER want to talk to again.

Good Riddance.

Rahima.

Pretence.

It is so easy to convince myself of anything.
It is so easy to pretend.

It's socially acceptable only to be happy
or at least content
so I play the part.
Sometimes I even believe it's true.

And I want so badly to feel
something
anything.
a Connection.
to Something.
Someone.

So I imagine that these feelings are genuine.
I convince myself it's real.
I create a life, a world around something I've
made up
in
my
head.

Me Against The World.

Right now I'm just sitting on a bridge, gazing down at the water, too scared to jump, but too afraid to stay. . .

And I'm Blasting My Music, So I Won't Hear My Thoughts.

Suddenly this is all too hard. I am tired of putting up walls. I want someone with the strength and the honesty to break them down.

But It's Only Me And I Walk Alone.

It takes less than a second for someone you trust and depend on to turn their back on you.

It takes less than a week for your life to unravel in ways it could never be repaired.

It takes a lifetime of abandonment to make you feel like you are worth nothing.

And it will take a whole other lifetime just to numb yourself to the pain.